2:33 am. I’ve seen this time too often these past few weeks. Weeks of transition, travel, see ya laters, catching up, late night chats, goodbyes. Each of us have our own things to be anxious about and it manifests itself in various ways. Shyness, whining, fear, tears, sleeplessness, nail biting, short tempers, tears.
Paul says be anxious about nothing.
But God what about the money we need? What about learning Bemba? What about the lists I need to make of all the stuff to do and buy when we first get there? Do we have what it takes to do this? What about Olivia and Simeon getting used to new people, friends, neighbors, school? What about boarding school and my little girl sleeping there instead of in our house? What will I say when Simeon says he can’t sleep until Olivia is with him? What will I say when people ask me hard questions or to provide for them something I don’t have? What will we do when we miss home and nothing about Zambia makes sense to our American selves?
Be anxious about nothing.
But I want to be anxious about this. If I’m not then how will it ever get done? Who will do it and take care of the details if I don’t obsess and lose sleep over them. Being anxious in my restless bed is productive right?
Be anxious about nothing, but in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. (Phil. 4:6)
God we can’t do this on our own. I know that. Everyone knows that. I guess I’m awake at 2:33am to present my requests to You, laying them at your feet in thankfulness that You go before us. Your Father’s heart fully understands my heart and the hearts of my family. Jesus you left home too and humbled yourself to being a baby, toddler, child, adolescent, adult, to the point of death, to bring us into relationship with you. You know all that we are experiencing and all of what lies ahead.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. (4:7)
The peace of God will guard my mind. The peace of God will guard me in Christ Jesus. That’s enough to let me fall asleep.