Be Anxious about…

2:33 am.  I’ve seen this time too often these past few weeks.  Weeks of transition, travel, see ya laters, catching up, late night chats, goodbyes.  Each of us have our own things to be anxious about and it manifests itself in various ways.  Shyness, whining, fear, tears, sleeplessness, nail biting, short tempers, tears.  

Paul says be anxious about nothing.  

But God what about the money we need?  What about learning Bemba?  What about the lists I need to make of all the stuff to do and buy when we first get there?  Do we have what it takes to do this?  What about Olivia and Simeon getting used to new people, friends, neighbors, school?  What about boarding school and my little girl sleeping there instead of in our house?  What will I say when Simeon says he can’t sleep until Olivia is with him?  What will I say when people ask me hard questions or to provide for them something I don’t have?  What will we do when we miss home and nothing about Zambia makes sense to our American selves?  

Be anxious about nothing.

But I want to be anxious about this.  If I’m not then how will it ever get done?  Who will do it and take care of the details if I don’t obsess and lose sleep over them.  Being anxious in my restless bed is productive right?

Be anxious about nothing, but in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  (Phil. 4:6)

God we can’t do this on our own.  I know that.  Everyone knows that.  I guess I’m awake at 2:33am to present my requests to You, laying them at your feet in thankfulness that You go before us.  Your Father’s heart fully understands my heart and the hearts of my family.  Jesus you left home too and humbled yourself to being a baby, toddler, child, adolescent, adult, to the point of death, to bring us into relationship with you.  You know all that we are experiencing and all of what lies ahead.  

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.  (4:7)

The peace of God will guard my mind.  The peace of God will guard me in Christ Jesus.  That’s enough to let me fall asleep.

-m

The Brown House

Three years ago, after returning home from Zambia, we moved into "the white house."  It was an old farmhouse, one that showed its age in creaky steps and a bathroom that was added on after plumbing came to town.  But it served us well, and we were thankful for a space of our own.  Soon after we moved in, the house next door became vacant.  The owners, it turned out, were bailing on both a failed business and their mortgage.  We admired that "brown house" every day--its large fenced-in yard, mature trees, bay window, closer proximity to Mary's granny--basically everything we could see from the outside.  As renters, we dreamed of owning a house, but not just any house--the brown house.

Then one day Mary saw a real estate agent putting up a sign at the brown house.  It was being sold in a short sale, which might save us a few bucks if we were willing to be patient.  Amazingly, it never went on the market--Mary's contact with the agent positioned us as the presumptive buyers, and after a 6-month process of chasing down lenders and divulging my deepest, darkest secrets to our bank, we were the new owners of the brown house.

Today, 18 months later, we are saying bye-for-now to the brown house.  God brought just the right tenant and just the right time, and we are moving in with Mary's parents for our last month in Virginia.  Our attempt at a proper farewell is a video we made of the kids walking around the house, recalling their favorite memories from each room (screenshots below).  In a relatively short time, this house has endeared itself to us in a big way.  Its yard has given Olivia and Simeon countless hours of play time; its kitchen and lounge has given us the opportunity to host three semesters of small groups; its half-finished basement has allowed us to host over a dozen guests; and the doggy door allowed for a happy existence for Riley and Peppermint (and no litter box cleaning for us!).  See you later, brown house.  -dan

Never say never

Deep breath...

It's been a long time, blog world.  Not sure I even remember how to do this.  But here goes...

Three years ago, we stepped onto a plane in Zambia, and I told myself I would be perfectly happy to never come back to this country again.  The country itself was fine, beautiful in fact; nothing wrong with the people either.  What made for a (sometimes) unpleasant 10 months in Zambia was the unfortunate mismatch between the vision of an American ostensibly in charge of an organization...and the vision of the rest of that organization.  Don't get me wrong, we experienced lots of great things there, and we had many opportunities to teach, build, serve and love.  But, for the reason above, among others, returning to Zambia was definitely not on my mind.

I have a feeling that when God hears us say "never," He smiles slyly and says back, "we'll see about that."  

The truth is, we have never once doubted that missions is in our blood.  We have always had our ears to the ground, listening for ways God might be preparing us for another mission field.  We've had several people ask us about joining their teams, but it never quite seemed right.  Towards the end of last year, we started to sense that one particular opportunity was more that just a nice idea.  Our friends Ben & Cat, whom we first met in Zimbabwe, have pioneered Foundations for Farming in central Zambia (about 3 hours from where we previously lived).  We exchanged messages, we Skyped, we talked with many counselors, and it became clear that this ministry opportunity brilliantly overlapped with our passion and giftings--a lot like our ministry in Zimbabwe.  

On Thanksgiving Day I boarded a plane (with Olivia, actually; great story there) for a quick visit to check out exactly what our friends were inviting us to join, praying for ears and eyes to perceive God's desires for us there.  In that short week, I saw some really encouraging things--a ministry focused on people and God's Kingdom, an internship program set up for life transformation, contextualized farming demos and training, not to mention a fantastic school where our kids would attend.  I didn't come back home absolutely convinced though, which was more due to lingering fears than anything else.  We spent another few weeks praying and seeking, and God faithfully led us to this conclusion: the Foundations for Farming outpost in Zambia is exactly what God has been preparing us for.  So, we said yes to them and plan to move there this summer! 

That was the long version, unless you ever get me in person, in which case I can make it much longer ;-)  So, here we are.  On the journey once again, this time with one more kid and a little more humility (I hope).  

rest

we just got back for a three day retreat just outside of town. when we planned this time away, i had a pretty long "to do" list for dan and me to get done. just before we left a friend of ours challenged us a story of how he had once gone away seeking answers and came away unsatisfied. he said if he had only gone to seek God and let the answers come as God had planned it would have been a great experience. i didn't really like letting go of my "to do" list but in the end it was wonderful. we ended up mostly just resting and spending time together as a family. we enjoyed one another- especially our funny little girl. we took walks, drank tea, sang songs that reminded us of our friends, prayed, went swimming, and read. it was lovely. it was relaxing and energizing. it was just what we needed.

-m

a whole month

i must apologize to my few readers that it has been over a month since i have posted. while i could like to say that life was just normal, the month did include some "exciting" things.

-our computer stopped reading it's wifi card and spent a week in the shop.

-we took olivia to the clinic at 11pm with a mysterious very high fever. it ended up being roseola and took care of itself.

-olivia has started eating solid foods and loves everything. she even made it through the hot sauce that dan accidentally fed her when he gave her some of her food.

-the peri-urban outreach started it's second year.

-our house mate, claire, got her work-permit extension. we are very happy about this because we like having her around!

-i am co-leading a bible study with a lovely group of ladies on Esther.

i think that is a good summary. otherwise our lives keep going.

-m

different

last week dan and i went on a date and found ourselves in a new mall in town. as we walked through i noticed that we were turning heads and this conversation followed:

me: everyone is looking at us.

d: yep.

me: not many white people come here do they?

d: i saw one but i think he was just walking through.

sometimes i forget we are different- then i go to town and remember.

-m

"can you pray for my son's school placement?"

one of the most confusing things for me to attempt to wrap my mind around is the school system. because i didn't go through this system or have a child going through it, understanding of it seems to elude me. this is what i know:

-creche (preschool) is now required for a child to be able to enter into grade 1.

-the levels are grade 1-7 and then form 1-6. grades correspond with the grades in america. forms seem to track with high school but not exactly.

-there are exams all the time. exams are a big deal here because that is what the schools use to pass or fail a student. exams are also used for school placement.

-there are also "O" levels (ordinary) or "A" levels (Advanced) which effect your ability to get into "varsity" (University) or a job. it is common to see job advertisments that say something like, "you must have passed 5 O levels, including english and computers".

-the schools function in 3 month terms with a month holiday at april, august, and december.

-every school has a uniform and a "sport" uniform. the everyday uniform includes: a hat, a shirt, a tie, trousers (for winter), a skirt for girls, shorts for boys, a sweater, socks, and shoes. some also have blazers and bakcpacks that include the school crest.

-there is a fee for every school- rural to city, private to government. some schools also have "top-ups" for the teachers because teachers have a low salary. at boarding schools there is also a donation of groceries.

-no lunch is served at school. the typical day starts between 7:30 and 8am and ends by 12:30 to 1pm. (lunch here is from 1-2pm)

-all school is in english.

i have no idea how one goes about choosing a school but i do know that it is a very important and difficult event in a parent's life. yesterday in bible study my friend, a mother of a 4 year old, asked us to pray for her son's school placement next year! they have already gotten letters stating there is no room for him at that school. immediately after that the lady next to me leaned over and said: "have you put olivia's name on a list for creche yet?" i said, "no, she is 6 months old!" to which she responded, "yes, so you had better do it soon." i just sat there astonished by the thought.

school fees are an issue all in themselves. people are always in need of school fees for their children. i have no idea how much school fees are in town but in the rural areas they are $30 a term, $90 a year (not including books, pens/pencils, paper, and the uniform). at the beginning of each term it never fails to see school children not in school. when you ask why the answer is: we didn't pay school fees yet. my american brain has a hard time understanding such things. it is illegal to not send your children to school in america. here the school sends your child home until you can pay.

our gardener works at our house in the afternoon and works in the morning at a creche in town. he was telling me that the creche is in english so he cannot speak shona to the children at all. this creche has set itself apart by offering lessons in english, gymnastics, swimming, drama and speech. so because everyone wants their child to get ahead they are willing to send them to a school that offers the best programs. but these top schools also come with top prices. this particular creche costs $1300 a term!

so there you have it friends. just one of the many things i have yet to understand.

-m

the vissani visit

our christmas was extended to more days than we expected because dan's parents came to visit. we knew that we would get to continue celebrating on the 26th but thanks to lost bags our presents slowly arrived over the first 5 days of their visit. thankfully the real reason they came was not to deliever gifts but to spend time with us and their beloved first granddaughter. since dan's mom is a better writer than i am, i will let her share with you her thoughts:

"Fernando and I had the most amazing time in Zimbabwe. Spending time with Dan and Mary and holding and playing with Olivia for the first time were the best gifts we could ask for at Christmastime (or anytime!). Learning about their ministry and meeting so many of their friends and associates warmed our hearts, as we could plainly see how much they are loved and cared for there, and how much their work means to so many. The country is beautiful, as are its people. God is at work, and it is wonderful to see the tapestry of the body of Christ in another land, another culture.

We enjoyed simple home visits as much as we did our "big field trip" to Victoria Falls. We met nationals who are being mentored by Dan and Foundations for Farming, and saw their crop (sometimes maize as tall as seven feet!). The Falls are awesome, and the surrounding community is unique and beautiful. In addition to a tour of Victoria Falls, we enjoyed a river cruise up the Zambezi River (spying hippos along the way) and a wild game ride where we spotted a large herd of elephants, multiple giraffe and zebra, up close and personal.

Precious were the many moments we just hung out at the house, getting to know our little baby girl. She is delightful...so pleasant and fun. And what a trooper -- she tolerated the 11-hour car ride to Victoria Falls as well as any infant could. When she wasn't sleeping or eating, she was mostly smiling and helping her grandparents to enjoy the ride. On our only Sunday morning there, we had the privilege of attending church service at Dan and Mary's home church, and witnessing Olivia's dedication. After the service, a luncheon was held in our honor -- another reflection of respect for Dan and Mary. We wore the African outfits that were made especially for us as a gift from our children."

-m

a new home

we've moved! we found a house on the other side of town (the side we spend most of our time on). and it is lovely! there are two great parts, other than the location. 1) it has a flat on one side so our friend claire now lives with us! 2) the garden is amazing! now when i saw garden i mean the yard and trees and flowers (which dan often uses to make me beautiful arrangements) and landscaping, not our vegetables. the vegetables haven't found a place to grow yet but we are working on that. here are a few pictures:

-m

sorry for the delay

it has been pointed out to me that we have not blogged in awhile. i will blame this on very expensive and slow internet. but God, in His mercy, has provided a solution to that problem. you can thank Him for our return to our blog.

-m

Christmas Kumusha

this year for christmas we decided to be truly zimbabwean and go kumusha (to the rural home). so we asked our co-workers, joseph and vivian if we could join them at vivan's family's rural home for christmas. because of various commitments we could only go from the 23 to 25 dec. but that little time was great. dan had never spent a night in a village so it was very exciting for him to get to experience new things.

christmas morning

bath time!

a little frisbee

fixing the cattle pen: the duty of the son-in-law

mopping the floor in the kitchen

olivia with gogo

with sekuru

-m

Greener Grass

I'll be honest, I am sometimes jealous of foreigners living in Zimbabwe who are working for multinational aid organizations. They don't raise their own support, but instead just receive handsome paychecks for managing projects. Their projects, as well, seem to enjoy budgets without limit. I'm not the only one who sees this alternate universe, but the Zimbabweans we serve with see it as well. They see that their countrymen working for these organizations enjoy higher pay and benefits like meals, transportation and new equipment such as laptops for all. Everything is provided, so all anyone has to do is show up and get paid--not much in the way of sacrifice is required. But when God graces me with the gift of clear thinking, I'm actually not jealous at all.

I think about our small team of Zimbabweans with whom we work. We don't have a lot of fancy things. Minibuses are by far the most common form of transport we use. During our weekly meetings, we reveiw every penny we spent on ministry, making sure it was well-spent and accounted for. We are each aware that our budget is graciously and sacrificially supported by churches and friends. I try to model frugality in ministry by hopping on the bus when it is more efficient to do so. The great thing is, I have actually seen attitudes changing...from assuming that money is endless and any expense is justified to carefully saving our ministry money and actually chipping in a bit themselves. In a country where no good deed goes unpaid, our co-workers are willing to give of their time and resources for God's work. If you think this is insignificant, or even unfortunate (I mean, shouldn't we just be giving poor Africans all our money???), let me assure you that this is a very good direction to be heading in.

No, I'm not really jealous of my big-budget counterparts. For once the grass is greener right here.

-D

olivia's quilt

i finally finished olivia's quilt! :) thanks the abigail and my mom who helped with material!

-m

a time for everything

this past weekend we went to another funeral. but this one was different from the rest. before now the only funerals we had been to were at our church because the funeral was replacing the Sunday morning service and we didn't know the deceased or the family.

on friday morning one of our friends from Foundations called and told us his 4 year old son had died the night before. on friday, dan went to visit our friend at the house and mourn with him. on saturday we both went to the house for the wake and then to the burial. it goes without saying that it was incredibly sad. i saw my usually smiling friends with somber faces. i watched women wail and need friends next to them to physically hold them up. for the first time i saw shona people sing but not dance. and every grave in the cemetery was of a child from 5 days to 4 years old. it felt strange to be holding my own child in that moment.

this funeral was different than any other funeral i had been to as well. most people in my life who have died were old. every death could be celebrated for the life they had had and their love for the Lord. but this little boy didn't really have a change to get to know Jesus. he didn't get a full life.

most of our friend's family also don't know Jesus. but the gospel was proclaimed at this funeral and i pray that it fell on soft hearts.

-m

Amos Mutakiwa

Ministry in Africa is full of joys but also frustrations and roadblocks...and sometimes it seems like the latter predominate. But today, one of my joys:

Amos Mutakiwa is one of my favorite people in Zimbabwe. He goes to our church in Kuwadzana and has a little house in a neighboring community, but spends most of his time on a small farm just outside Harare owned by some relatives of his. He has been interested from the very beginning in what this crazy white guy was saying about farming God's way, and for the past eight months he has been a faithful farmer in our outreach. This means, of course, that he has a group of farmers he has been teaching and mentoring over these months. A few weeks ago I went to visit him with Joseph and Vivian.

...and we were not disappointed in the least. His trainees were as knowledgeable about FfF as he was (a very good sign!) and his pre-rainy-season demo plots were superb. In the photo above he is holding a measuring wire that is a cut above what we are recommending--made to last, and definitely doesn't stretch (can be a problem with measuring ropes). Now the question is--how will his rain-fed crops fare? Unfortunately the relatives he is working for don't necessarily approve of FfF...they think any kind of farming without a plow is doomed to fail. But more unfortunately, that family fails to harvest much more than a fourth of what is possible with FfF. So, Amos is doing what he can. He will grow a small portion of maize the way he believes is best, while following the demands of others on the bulk of the land. We hope and pray that his diligence will prove the merits of FfF to his family, so that next year they can fully experience the benefits. Way to hang in there, Mr. Mutakiwa.

-d

on being a new mom

being a mom has its fair share of joys and challenges. many things about parenting fall into both the joy and the challenge category- like breastfeeding, napping, showing off our precious little one but my favorite at the moment is unsolicited advice.
here are a few that i have gotten in my first seven weeks:
feed her porridge, she needs a blanket, she needs a hat, where are her socks?, she need lotion, you shouldn't bath her so often, hold her like this, support her neck more, don't sit her up- she needs to lay down, trim her nails, oh she has a rash try _____, and the list goes on. my favorite was the lady in church who came down off the main stage to reposition olivia and didn't even speak a word to me. most of this advice drives me crazy. i realize that many of these ladies giving me advice have more experience than i do but do they not remember what it is like to feel ill-equipped to do the job and have people constantly giving advice?
of course there have been some great bits of advice that i didn't ask for but have come in handy or at least make me laugh. my favorite is from my Kenyan friend, Lorna, "heat rash is better than pneumonia, so wrap her up in another blanket".

-m

new address

we have a new address!

so please send all of your fan mail for olivia here:

Vissani
PO Box M83
Mabelreign, Harare
ZIMBABWE

ps. her parents like receiving mail as well.

mcdonalds

yep! i finally had mcdonalds after 1 year and 20 days! thank you south africa.

pictures of olivia

can be found here

kumusha

the months of april, august, and december are school holiday months here. a few things happen during school holidays: 1- everything stops so that people can go on holiday as a family and 2- lots of people go to their musha or rural homes. our neighbor just got back from visiting his gogo (grandmother) at her musha. he hated it because she made him work in the fields and to a 7 year old city kid that isn't exactly fun. but one thing he was excited about was that he came home with a rooster. when i first heard about this i was told it was a chicken. that's great- they will eat a yummy meal of tough (zimbabweans love tough meat) farm raised chicken! but no this was not a chicken it is a rooster. and it was not eaten the next day as i was first told but is still alive 5 days later. so all night and all day i hear that rooster call. good thing i have a little girl who likes to wake up in the night as well and give us something to do or that rooster would just be really annoying.

i guess we don't have to live in the rural areas after all- they will just come to us.

-m